Are you alone, lonely or both?

If you’re single you are alone – meaning that you do not have a life partner; but are you lonely?

Lonely – The painful awareness of being alone

How do you know if you’ve crossed the line of aloneness into loneliness? I’ve crossed that line and I’m no longer happy being alone because let’s face it I’m lonely. Here are the things that made me painfully aware I am alone:

1)      Concerts – Summertime is usually a big concert going time of year for me, I love live music and I love going to big music events.  In the past I had a few people who I could call upon to join me in getting our ‘Rock On’.  However ‘Coupledom’ has claimed them and I cannot impose my crazy concert fetish on them any longer. This year that awareness hit me full force in the face and with that I realized… I’m lonely.

2)      Parties – I am the person that is always showing up alone and NOT because it is my choice.

3)      The warm weather – During the winter months it is easy to hideout and away from people because it’s just too damn cold (my go to excuse). However come spring / summer every time I leave the house I see couples frolicking about. It’s one more reminder that another season has passed and I am still alone.

4)      My iPhone – I love my phone it’s great as a paperweight, for listening to tunes, surfing the net, and getting the weekly calls from mom. It is also my constant reminder that no one is calling me to hangout or see how my day is going. When I go away with the girls they all get messages of – have a great trip, I miss you, and I can’t wait until you come home, etc.  I get a message from cellular provider to remind me that I’ve used 75% of my data plan.

5)      Movies – I love watching movies and every time I see a commercial for a new flick that I would like to see such as ‘The Dark Knight Rises’ or Savages it’s another reminder that I have no one to go with.

6)      Snooki – YES Snooki from Jersey Shores has found love.

Come on! Seriously this boggles my mind, she can find love and I can’t even get a movie date.

So what’s a gal to do when she realizes that she is lonely? I think we just need to ride the lonely wave, cry if you feel like it, feel sorry for yourself, devour a bag of chips, Mint Milano’s or tub of ice cream, write out the reasons why you are happy to be single

Do whatever it is you want to do to acknowledge this feeling. Then get over it! We cannot let loneliness take over our lives, it’s just a moment and like all moments it too will pass and you will go back to being happily alone.

Are you happy to be alone or are you lonely? What do you do to get through the lonely phase of Singledom?


  1. I found this (painfully) reminiscent of my life right now, especially the part about the iPhone. Sad. For me holidays like Memorial Day/July 4th remind me that I am lonely.

  2. This resonates with me too! Lonliness can creep up especially when those you are close to become part of a couple and your relationship changes.

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