1) Why are you single? – This is usually followed-up up with a list of all our awesome qualities. I know the person saying this intends for it to be a compliment. HOWEVER…
The Single Gal interprets this as ‘OMG if I am so awesome WHY am I single? I must need to lose weight, stop fidgeting, be more serious etc.’ whatever we think our flaws are we will now start to obsess even more over them.
2) You have a date? Why is HE single at 30-40 (etc.) something? – If I can be an awesome single why can’t my potential date be just as awesome – a normal funny guy with a run of bad luck in the dating minefield.
Saying this to a Single Gal will make her look for flaws therefore sabotaging the date before it has happened. Also this plagues our mind that people are saying the same thing about us to our potential date – Why is SHE single?
3) It will happen when you’re not looking for IT – Contrary to popular belief we Single Gals are not always looking for IT (a.k.a The One, Happily Ever After, Soul Mate, Baby Daddy). After spending a certain amount of time in Singledom you give up on finding IT.
Single Gals know this is just a polite way of saying ‘Sorry Girlfriend but you’re going to be single for a while so suck it up. I’m tired of hearing about you man less woes’
4) Maybe you should try online dating / Maybe you should try online dating again – When you say this to us you are confirming that we have officially been single way too long and you are starting to worry.
If your Single pal has not tried online dating she is probably lying because we all hit that wall of desperation where online dating actually seems like a good idea. If she hasn’t told you it’s because she is embarrassed that after 3 months she did not get a date, or she is hiding her shame of desperation.
If your Single Gal pal has tried online dating and it was a disaster… forget it she will never do it again. Regardless of the friend whose cousin’s – sister-in-law’s – doctor’s – nanny’s daughter who met her husband online.
5) We know this great guy you should meet – This is the most painful of all. When a Single Gal is told of a potential great guy, we go against our better judgement and actually get hopeful. We are secretly hoping you will make it happen and that YES he is a great guy. Therefore when nothing comes of this, but the occasional oh we should really get you to meet so and so you are toying with our fragile emotional state. Even the most confident, secure, happy Single Gal will let the wall down a bit to indulge in the belief they are going to meet a great guy.
Even though your intentions are pure of heart you need to remember that we Single Gals are fragile somewhat desperate beings that have probably not been laid in a long while or had any male contact therefore putting us on the defensive.
Instead of trying to make us feel better about our Single status why not take your Single Gal pal out for drinks and be her wing woman.