How to Stop Self-Criticism in 6 steps

As women we tend to be very critical of ourselves. It’s easy for us to sincerely praise and validate others but when it comes to valuing ourselves, we tend to be very critical and unforgiving. We need to quiet our critical inner voice as this will be one of the best self-love things we’ll ever do.

How to Stop Self-Criticizing

I have listed six steps to help quiet your inner critic. Go through the steps and you’ll discover a more peaceful and happy existence.

Follow these steps:

Step 1 – Acknowledge that self-criticism can be damaging. It destroys your self-esteem, confidence and prevents you from going after your dreams. Not to mention wreak havoc on your mental wellbeing.

Step 2 – Write down your criticisms and go through them one by one and ask yourself, “Is this really valid?” chances are it’s NOT, now cross it off your list.

Step 3 – Look at each criticism that you wrote down and figure out when that narrative began. Take time to resolve why you feel that way and forgive yourself.

Step 4 – Now it’s time to release the negative remarks from your repertoire because they simply hold no validity for you now. Create a list of positive remarks that way when a self-criticism pops in your head you have a positive to quickly replace that thought.

Step 5 – Replace your critical voice with the kind, supportive, caring voice you use with loved ones.

Step 6 – Stay focused, keep working at achieving your desires. You can challenge the validity of any criticism simply by continuing with your efforts.

Your got this, you are worthy of all that you desire. If you fall back into old habits of self-criticism just redo that steps. Now go and be the most confident, successful being that you were meant to be.

Remember your status may be Single but you’re not alone!

Got an interview?

It’s been almost two years since I lost my job and the day I lost my job, I immediately went online and started job hunting. The next day I got phone call asking if I could come in for an interview on Friday just two days later. Now keep in mind that I did not sleep the night I got the news, nor did I eat that day or the next. I was just running on coffee and a strong will to keep it together. I was excited to have an interview but no where near being emotionally sound enough to handle it. I was still trying to process it all.

The interview…

Interview day arrives, I’m running on 4 hours sleep and a large black coffee. I get there and the doorbell to the office is not working, I’m panicking because I was 15 minutes early and did not want them to think I was late. I call the woman I am meeting to tell her I was outside, she comes to get me and I realized I could have just knocked it was a glass door and a small office (not proud but I was not fully functioning). My interview is with the HR manager and the finance manager, they were both pleasant and very nice. I was no nervous my hands had a life of their own, it got so bad that I sat on them to stop them from flailing all over the place. I eventually said I’m so sorry I am nervous and I really have no idea why my hands are moving so much. This broke the ice and the HR manager said ‘I know dear, I was going to let you know it’s ok, and word of advice if you go on other interviews just let them know you are nervous’. They had asked me when did I get notice of being laid off, I’m shocked them when I said it was 2 days ago, but this also explained to them why I was so nervous.

I survived the interview, even cracked a joke as I was leaving. I’m not 100% sure how I did it but by the end of that day I got offered the job. When I talked to the HR manager she said she liked me before meeting me. She said I was well spoken and she loved my resume. She also proceeded to tell me that she thinks the company will be very lucky to have me. I almost cried because I’m being appreciated before I even get through the door. It was validation that I am worthy and have value in the work place.

I did take that job but have moved on. It was what I needed to keep my head above water because I would not have survived on EI.

The moral of this story is always be yourself and be honest when you feel you are not representing yourself properly. We may feel like a hot mess but others may not see you that way. Remember we are our worst critics.

Good luck to all those on the job hunt, the universe will provide.

Remember you’re not alone!