Running but I did not find the high…

A couple of months ago Steve (my main squeeze) and I decided we want to add to our workout repertoire, so we hired our friend and awesome trainer Lanny to help get us to the next level of fitness. We have just finished our 10 sessions and I am happy to say I can now fit into my favorite pair of black jeans that last year I could not  button up. Now I can button them and still have a little wiggle room. SWEET!

Steve is just all around amazing, he has lost over 50lbs in the last two years, and together we plan to reach our fitness goals. So to get there we decided that every Tuesday and Thursday we will do a late evening 5K run.   

running

Yesterday was my first attempt at running the 5k with Steve and Lanny. It started off all fine and dandy; I had my breathing under control and I was able to ignore the different areas of pain I was feeling in my legs. However somewhere along the way I was overcome with anger, I was pissed that I decided this was good idea, pissed that I was not experiencing that runners high. I seriously had hoped by now I would be feeling like Leo DiCaprio in Basketball Diaries as he is running through the field. Sadly no feelings of euphoria came but oh joy what’s up ahead.. a hill! A fucking Hill!!!

I start-up the hill; it was rough going and it only got worse. As I watch my running buddies stride up it with ease,  my anger came back.  I could not ignore the pain in my thighs any longer and I broke the one rule we had and that was ‘No Stopping on the Hill’. Fuck the rules I say and I stopped! BIG mistake that was, suddenly my well controlled heart rate went through the roof, I felt like I was having an asthmatic attack verging on a panic attack.  I could feel the onset of frustration tears when I see my main squeeze striding towards me. Instantly I was overcome with that peaceful feeling I get when he is around and the urge to punch him in the face because at that moment I blamed him for this stupid idea of running.

In his calm manner he tells me to raise my arms over my head, and to take deep breaths through my nose.  I was able to get my breathing under control and the tears of frustration  that were hovering at that edge of my eyelids had slowly retracted back to be saved for another day. Needless to say this is one of the many reason why I love him.

We caught up to Lanny who was waiting for us at the top of the hill, they both made me feel better with words of encouragement and I was able to finish off what we started. The hill won this round but I will be back and I will conquer it!

Today I am a little sore but feel a lot better about the idea of running, I will give it another go on Thursday and continue until I conquer that hill!

If you have any tips to help me reach that runners high, I would love to hear them.

Iyanla Fix My ‘Love’ Life…

Monday evening I turn on the TV and it happens to be on the OWN network. I see that Iylanla Fix My Life is coming on next. I was about to change the channel when the show starts and Iyanla asked “what’s making you single?” Then she goes on to say that she will be dealing with common mistakes that women make causing them to remain single. Needless to say I sat my ass back down and did not move from the TV for the next hour.

First she starts off with ‘It’s not HIM! Stop blaming HIM!’ Very powerful words, at first you may read this and get your knickers all bunched up but after you’ve gotten over your righteous indignation really think about these words. The ‘HIM’ in your life may very well be a narcissistic ass that puts you down all the time, a  commitment phobe , lazy  or whatever else you have labeled the men that have let you down. When she says stop blaming him she is saying look deep within yourself and ask WHY did you pick him in the first place? Did you pick the man who constantly puts you down because you believe that you are not good enough so you picked someone who is willing to verbalize your belief?

Do you believe that all the good ones are taken? That all men just want one thing and do not want to commit? Or that you don’t need a man because you can take care of yourself? Whatever it is that you’re verbalizing for you lack of love is exactly what you will find. Our limiting beliefs and fears will show up in our world. Buddha said it best “All that we are is the result of what we have thought”

Iyanla asked the audience to truthfully answer the following questions:

1)      What’s getting in the way of finding the one you love? What gets in my ways is_______________

2)      What is it that you don’t want a man to know about you? I don’t want him to know __________________

In order to fix your single life you need to fix your belief system. So ladies grab a notepad and write down all of your limiting beliefs and fears, read them, think about them and then write a new postive affirming belief beside it. Say these new beliefs out loud and start believing them.

Iyanla gave everyone homework, she said to go out there and say Hi to every man you pass (every man without a women hanging off his arm that is). Just say Hi without expecting anything from it. So gals get out there and a flash your pearly whites, and see what happens.

I beleive you will find the love that you truly desire, do you?

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